Cody Delistraty is a journalist and he's also a son whose mother died of cancer. These two identities intersect in his new book, The Grief Cure, which chronicles his quest to find a way to eliminate the pain of grief. After exploring Laughter Therapy, silent meditation, Breakup Bootcamp, and other avenues for grief expression, Cody landed where so many others do: realizing the "cure" for grief is allowing it to exist, while still engaging with life. 

We discuss: 

1. Who Cody was when his mom died
2. How he used to define "successful" grief
3. The secondary losses connected to his mother's death
4. How his relationship to the 5 Stages of Grief evolved over time
5. The quest to "cure" grief and the options he explored
6. Which grief memory Cody most wished he could erase
7. How important community can be
8. Learning to embrace both grief and an ongoing connection with his mother

Cody Delistraty is a journalist and speechwriter in New York City. As a journalist, he has written stories, profiles and essays for The New York Times, The New Yorker and The Atlantic, among many others. He has served as culture editor at The Wall Street Journal‘s magazine and as features editor of the Paris-based magazine Mastermind.

It's impossible to speak for an entire community, especially when it comes to grief, but Sharice Burnett, LCSW, knows a lot about the ripple effect of loss in the Black and African American community in Portland, OR. Born and raised in the community, Sharice is a clinical mental health therapist and consultant dedicated to naming and dismantling the larger systemic barriers that stand in the way of Black children and families having access to culturally relevant support, particularly mental health and grief support. 

We discuss:

• Grieving the loss of an entire generation of elders during the Covid-19 pandemic
• The grief and displacement from the Vanport Flood of 1948
• The cultural nuances of grief
• Historic, intergenerational, and collective grief
• The unacknowledged grief of racism
• How each death & loss ripples out to the larger Black/African American Portland community
• How safety from racial harm is critical to accessing grief support services
• Sharice's hopes and dreams for creating more culturally relevant grief support
• Creative grief support & healing spaces for Portland's Black community (Black Rose Wellness) 

This episode is the third and final in our 2024 three-part series highlighting the voices of communities who have historically been underrepresented in the grief world. The series is part of an ongoing collaboration between Dougy Center and The New York Life Foundation. We are deeply grateful for New York Life Foundation's tireless support and advocacy for children and teens who are grieving.

Lisa Keefauver is a lot of things - she's a writer, speaker, educator, social worker, podcast host, mother, widow, and grief activist. She came to the last two titles when her personal experience of grieving for her husband Eric, who died of a brain tumor in 2011, intersected with her professional life as a clinician. At this intersection, Lisa realized just how grief illiterate the world is and how that illiteracy creates unnecessary suffering for those who are grieving. Lisa hosts the acclaimed podcast, Grief is a Sneaky Bitch and recently published her book, Grief is a Sneaky Bitch: An Uncensored Guide to Navigating Loss.   

We discuss:

• The gift of love from her husband Eric
• Living in the both/and of grief and life
• Being a mental health professional while grieving
• Navigating a breast cancer diagnosis in a medical system that failed her husband
• How we bring our full history into each new loss
• The "shoulds" that hassled Lisa
• The grief time warp
• Grief thieves - including the one in the mirror
• Lisa's go-to skill in her own grief
• The power of observation & being with grief as it is

Lisa Keefauver is a grief activist, speaker and author. She began her career as a social worker and narrative therapist in 2004. She expanded her activism in a variety of roles: clinical director, non-profit co-founder, clinical supervisor, facilitator of personal and professional growth and healing, and mentor. Lisa's wisdom and insights on grief are also embodied from her personal losses, including the death of her husband Eric in 2011.